Saarlan

Unsure of how to assess the situation, Tess leaned backwards, open palms spread upon the floor. She could have sworn she saw a disparaged look flash across Rip's face, but maybe her vision was more off balance than she realized. She wasn't quite yet used to bouts of affection from her lover, and didn't want to do anything to offend her or send her off running. Tess didn't mind the still-damp locks spread over her knees or the hot breath making the fine hair on her thighs feel like porcupine needles standing at attention. She wondered why Rip was being so quiet right now, seemingly not upset at her. "She can't be upset at me, anyway," Tess thought, her mouth slightly curled upwards in a self-righteous smirk. "I haven't said or did anything wrong. She was the one accusing me of this and that, acting as if what we just did was just something people do normally. How could she be mad at me?! It's not my fault I was gone for two months! She can't sulk! It'd be such a waste of time and energy. As a matter of fact---"

That was it. Nothing was about blame, accusations or word slinging. How could Tess have not realized how distraught and vulnerable Rip must have been during her absence? It had to have been agony to have woken up one morning not with the person she loves, but with someone else entirely. How lonely it was for her to walk and talk with someone who looked just like her beloved, but who had no access or recollection of shared moments and intimacies. It must have felt an eternity to associate with someone so cold and unfeeling on a daily basis representing nothing more than a mockery of their relationship. 

How relieving it must have been for Rip, to finally do away with all inhibitions and delve into matters of the heart: to be free of the confinements of her mind, fully embracing the body she could only observe and keep at a distance. Tess was once again hers; to have, to hold, to kiss, to love. They could pick up exactly where they had left off; continue sharing their fears, their apprehensions, their dreams, their desires. They could start in a new place; a new chapter, a new milestone, a new way to express their longing. 

Tess felt like a monster. 

She suddenly leaned up then forwards and wrapped her arms around Rip's shoulders. Tess kissed the top of her head, then leaned her head against hers. "I... think I drank too much," she admitted. "I'm sorry for making you think there was something off-putting about tonight. It, we, you, everything: simply wonderful."

Tess shot up from the floor, feeling incredibly light headed as a result. She ran her fingers through her knotty hair, fingers getting caught in the larger of the tangles. She swayed a bit, cursing herself for thinking that three quarters of a bottle of pinot noir would satiate her ill feelings. Conversely, she felt all the more nauseous now, realizing how feeble-minded and ludicrous she must seem in front of her lover. Tess yanked her fingers from her hair and  felt her way to the previously unoccupied bed. She fell upon top of the heap of clothing, as it had been used as make-shift wardrobe for Tez who had taken to sleeping on the couch. She shut her eyes against the spinning ceiling, hoping that Rip would hurry out of the bathroom. Tess longed to take her rightful place as the empress of the porcelain throne.

The auburn haired one looked up at the towering woman, wide eyed and dry mouthed. "Puke on the bed!?" she cried in indignation. "What kind of cad do you take me for!?" Not waiting for a response, Tess pulled herself out of bed. She tried her best to walk to the bathroom as composed as her intoxicated body would allow her, but all the furniture proved to be her greatest foes: she bumped into the corner of the nightstand, knocked over an unlit lamp, fumbled into a shelf-- and so on.

Several scrapes and bruises later, Tess arrived at her ultimate destination. She took a seat upon the floor, beside the toilet of course, concentrating on the coldness of the tiles against her bare skin. She sat there, almost as if she were unsure of what to do next. "Rip..." she called from behind the open door. "I'm lonely."

Wide glistening eyes stare up at the loud, over-towering woman. The thought of being pricked by needles and watching as someone collected "samples" of her bodily waste were less than desired. The until-recently sober woman felt a fresh wave of sickness overcome her present state, and before she got a chance to argue, she began to expel crimson liquid along with other unrecognizable particles. Tess continued to vomit as long fingers grasped her hair back, saving it just in time. She and Rip remained in this fashion for several moments; Rip's hands soothed her lover's neck and back until she felt she had purged all the toxins out. As Tess began to wipe her mouth with several squares of toilet paper she ripped off the roll, she made sure to flush the toilet before Rip managed to scoop up some materials for "scientific purposes." Tess ignored the indignant huffs behind her as she washed her hands and peered at Rip from the mirror's reflection. 

The pair left the bathroom, one after the other. Tess went off towards the kitchen for a glass of infused water to swallow down one of the mysterious pills Rip had given her for an expedient recovery. The auburn haired one then took a seat upon the love seat in the living area and beckoned for Rip to take a seat beside her. "Come here and spoil me," Tess said, her voice minutely strained from her previous excursion. "Although you're doing a fine job so far wearing that little number for me. Stop fiddling with it. You look so... scintillating." Tess added that last part with the biggest grin she could muster, looking a mixture of creepy and still-sick looking. She had to get some credit for trying at least.

Tess tilted her head against Rip's shoulder and exhaled, trying to not think of the maelstrom in her stomach. She distracted herself by tracing her fingers along the strong arms wrapped around her, also plucking at loose threads hanging from the sleeves of the robe that adorned them. There was bliss in this moment, in this tenderness that didn't ask for much: it only required the warmth of a lover's body, and a melding of the shared longing for an everlasting companionship. Not just any companionship, of course, but this particular one. Tess' mind then began to wander. In the contented and comfortable silence of touching and being touched, Tess thought of the myriad ways Rip's and her days could come to pass. The future seemed so distant, but each day got them closer to it. Would they live in this hotel as they have been? Would they eventually move into an actual house? Would Rip have to travel a lot because of her position in the Empire? Would she be left behind on Shili, or would she be invited to travel along? What was she going to do with her life? Would she only be seen as an insignificant person in Rip's life in the eyes of others? How could she make a name for herself and prove she's a valuable asset?

Tess shifted a bit, momentarily troubled by the decline in her own self-worth and confidence. She wasn't exactly in the mood to begin this conversation with her lover, especially not after all that had happened in the night. She had to say something though before her wrinkled brow gave away too much. "Tez is such a square, isn't she?" Tess said ungracefully. "I probably threw up because of her zero-tolerance policies about alcohol. This body has become used to not drinking, and I went too far with that bottle, eh? Anyway, thank you for helping me. How have you been, Rip? Tell me about anything and everything that happened while I was gone. Actually, if it's too soon, don't say anything. I assume you were miserable and stressed most of the time. Let's talk about whatever you want. Well, you talk. I'll listen. I talk too much as it is..." The auburn haired chatter box felt a flash of hot travel across her body, a mixture of embarrassment and nausea. She quickly turned her head, and being unable to reach her lover's cheek, planted a deep kiss on the moon kissed neck she caught herself staring at so many times in the past. She hoped her dry and cracked lips didn't offend.

The younger of the pair furrowed her eyebrows, a gesture she was sure her face had not made in quite some time. She also shifted uncomfortably in her seat out of both embarrassment and uncertainty. No, she shouldn't be insulting her sister behind her back, but it was never an issue before. Why, exactly, was her lover defending the one person in the world she trusted the least? Were Tess' suspicions correct- was Tez winning Rip over day by day? Was Tess now unable to speak her mind freely, for fear of her words traveling to the source of said statements? This couldn't be happening. This all had to be intoxicated paranoia.

But... Even so, it wouldn't be like her to keep silent. Tess' time was too short to be spent pent up with fear and accusations. In fact, that was why she is the way she is: impulsive, blunt, straight forward and honest. Nothing could be gained sitting idle through out life. Tess pulled back from Rip's embrace and looked at her directly in the eyes. "This is going to sound insane," she began, her face flushing more with each word. "I need you to be honest with me. Are you- Do you- Is there something going on with you and Tez?"

A chuckle escaped the pale lips of the nausea inflicted woman. "When you say it that way, it almost sounds as if we're trapped in a soap opera," she said in a way to diffuse the tension that was slowly building. "My mind is in a lot of strange places right now, Rip. This whole, what should I call it, experience, with you, is unlike anything that has ever happened in my life. I have doubts where and when I don't think I should, but hope in others that make up for it. I'm scared that another person hangs about in an unreachable area threatening to unearth all that we have. But... if you can trust her, then I guess I have no choice but to do the same. Sad, isn't it? I don't even trust the only family member I have left. But so it goes, right? I just don't want her winning you over, or conspiring with you against me. Just promise me that you'll always be on my side." Tess crossed then uncrossed her legs. "Actually, I can't make you promise that. You're your own person; you're strong, independent, cunning. You don't really need me. I don't even think I'm very useful to you here. Tez is much better suited to aid you in times of strife. All I can do is close ranged combat, nothing with big blasters or explosives. But I can follow orders. Well, kind of. There has to be something useful about me though, otherwise you would have sent me away ages ago. Maybe I'm just tired, over thinking about everything. Not thinking clearly, even. Rambling, per usual."

Tess looked down her arm, her wrist throbbing with the pressure her lover was putting on it. Tess' mouth twisted a bit, waiting to see if Rip even noticed her knuckles turning white as she gripped tighter and tighter. "Um, Rip..." Tess murmured to grab her attention.

Reclining a bit, Tess put her arm upon the chair's armrest. She began to pluck at the stitching, tugging at loose threads, as she took in what Rip was saying. Was she actually talking about what Tess thought she was talking about? Was this open threat something of a promise she would carry out in the future? How did she define "losing usefulness" anyway? Catching an illness? Missing an arm? Getting old? Her sinister statement not only proved that all was well between the two women (in regards to faithfulness, anyway) but it also had an edge of ambiguity. In Rip's perspective, anything at all was possible. She could claim at any point, for any reason, that Tess wasn't useful. Would Tess have to be careful to not drop a dish, or pick out the wrong drapes? That was preposterous!

Right?

"Rip, let's get something clear between us," Tess said, yanking out a long crimson thread. It snapped loudly and she felt a sharp sensation against her digits. "It's too soon in the relationship for threats, even if you think you're doing me a favor, don't you think? I understand your angle, but it gives off an... unnecessary air of underlying menace. Talking like that makes it feel that usefulness is subjective, and subjective only to you. Shouldn't it be something we can agree upon, anyway? Unless you're trying to be ironically funny, waving around that knife, then, good one. It's kind of hard to tell when you're joking, though." Tess squinted. "Which is it?"

The auburn haired one didn't exactly feel uncomfortable in this moment, but something was nagging at her internally. Something deep from within her subconscious? There was an odd sense of familiarity in this moment, but she didn't remember being threatened in such a way before. Was she experiencing deja vu from a deep rooted memory belonging to Tez? There were many things she tried to keep from sister, so it made Tess wonder about the things that were kept from her. A deep sadness began to swell in Tess' chest as she began to think of possible imaginary situations that could have happened to drudge up such sensations. She tried to keep her face as normal as she could, fighting to keep her mind from wandering any further.

Perhaps sibling reconciliation was the next thing on her to-do list after all.

A feeling of bemusement intermingled with skepticism sprawled across Tess' psyche. She could sense Rip's confusion, almost feel it reaching out for her throat, with the way her hair seemed to be coiling on its own. It was obvious what was going on- Tess spent enough time with the raven haired miss to know what was flashing through her mind. What to Rip seemed a cleverly sardonic joke, Tess responded with a sardonic quip of her own, thus off put the infamous sharp shooter immensely. Tess could almost see the series of questions in Rip's fine tuned thoughts fighting to be answered logically, causing her grievous internal strife. In fact, Tess felt almost as a child would with their parent when they reached a sort-of impass: satisfied knowing something their elder didn't. A lop-sided grin spread across her face.

Tess then removed herself from the love seat and sauntered on over to where her lover was standing in the kitchen area. She took from the counter the citrus fruit that was procured from the crisper. "Oh, don't make that face, " Tess said lightly, then took a bite of the outer skin. She spat out the inedible rind in the sink and slowly begin to peel it. She felt a deep satisfaction digging her nails into the fruit, feeling the spray of the juice on her fingers as she separated the outer layer from the fruit itself. What a metaphor! "You're much too serious sometimes, you know that? There's a lot we have yet to learn about each other, it seems. I'm incredibly sarcastic at times; I think I use it as a self defense mechanism of sorts. But listen-" At this point, Tess began to rip apart the pulpy segments and teased one of them against Rip's lips. "You're safe here with me. I'm not trying to hurt you or make you feel insecure. Hell, I'm so damn awkward I won't even notice if I accidentally insult you. If my words are displeasing or nonsensical, or even contradictory to what you believe, just say so. Don't stew. I can tell there's going to be a lot of firsts between us, and there will be plenty of more my tall broody Gorgon, so let's work together with fine tuning. Here now, open your mouth."