Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 19, 2013 17:02:57 GMT -8
Why do I get the distinct impression that your idea of a deep tissue massage involves sharp and pointy things?
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Kalosis
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Post by Kalosis on May 19, 2013 17:03:56 GMT -8
... Kinky.
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Cassel Lockpick
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Everything is just so interesting . . . remarkably at the same time!
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Post by Cassel Lockpick on May 19, 2013 17:15:23 GMT -8
We should do lunch sometime Diva! I make wonderful chocolate chip cookies, and macadamia nuts cookies, and muffins! I found a muffin button! It makes the best blueberry muffins. I'm still searching for the milk button...You know, the one that creates glasses of milk. I've heard that it was in the hands of Eralam. What a crystal needs with milk....I don't have any idea. I suppose everyone loves milk...
But man I really need a milk button for all my cookies.
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Kalosis
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Post by Kalosis on May 19, 2013 17:15:53 GMT -8
... Muffin Button!!
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Diva, from Aeons Torn
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If blood is the currency of life, then what's its tax collection service?
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Post by Diva, from Aeons Torn on May 19, 2013 17:57:58 GMT -8
Yes and no.
Hmm.... If I remember correctly, Lahash was into bondage or tourture. And on second thought, I can see how Cassel IS scary. Not to ME, of course, since we come from too similar a place, but yes, I can see how he freaks out OTHERS. Credit must be given where it is doo...err... due.
Let it never be said I can't come to my senses. |
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 19, 2013 18:00:22 GMT -8
I swear that beneath that playful innocent pranking is the soul of something truly evil. Some dark magic is at play here. He survived a barfight where his head would have earned the one who removed it drinks for life with only minor bruising.
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Diva, from Aeons Torn
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Post by Diva, from Aeons Torn on May 19, 2013 18:32:55 GMT -8
You gotta think OUTSIDE the box. No scratch that. You gotta MAKE a new box for out people to be stuck inside that box while you get them from outside the box.
I think that's what Cassel does.
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Kalosis
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Post by Kalosis on May 19, 2013 18:39:11 GMT -8
Brilliant....
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 19, 2013 18:39:12 GMT -8
I'd rather riddle the box with holes with him in it.
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Kalosis
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Post by Kalosis on May 19, 2013 18:39:48 GMT -8
Works too.
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Cassel Lockpick
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Everything is just so interesting . . . remarkably at the same time!
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Post by Cassel Lockpick on May 19, 2013 19:34:09 GMT -8
Cassel pushes his spectacles up higher on his nose, as they had came down a bit. The light he stood in caused a glare making it impossible to see his eyes. He smiled.
What if there never was a box? What if you are all just imagining the box, creating it to try and rationalize what you simply cannot understand?
Cassel sneezes, the glasses fly off, and he rubs the back of his head, smiling impishly. He munches on a cookie, and waves it at the crowd of people in the thread.
I believe that I'm a pretty beloved character on this site. I can't help it if your levels of intelligence are too low to comprehend the comedy style I present. You'll all be sorted out in the end...
Cassel begins skipping around the thread, humming a tune.
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Diva, from Aeons Torn
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If blood is the currency of life, then what's its tax collection service?
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Post by Diva, from Aeons Torn on May 19, 2013 19:49:14 GMT -8
No, I know I'm right. The fog outside my window agrees, and who are you to disagree with fog? It's fog! Don't be silly. Feel the fog against your skin. It likes you. It wants to make you happy. It wants to make you wet, but not a nasty drench like wet, but a nice, damp, wet.
Hell, even HUMMING sounds better in fog.
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Cassel Lockpick
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Everything is just so interesting . . . remarkably at the same time!
Posts: 118
Affiliation: The Adventure
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Post by Cassel Lockpick on May 19, 2013 19:57:26 GMT -8
It actually turns out my process is a lot more simplified than boxes and bags of illegal drugs. Drugs are bad. My brother tried a bit of Angelfire one time...I think that's what he called it. He said it made him feel like he was on fire. He spent about three hours running around, and the next two hours after that rolling down very long hills.....
Cassel shakes his head in sadness.
Needless to say even though he kept saying he was on fire, the marshmallows would not roast over him. My niece was so disappointed. She had really looked forward to eating some s'mores...Just like when we all used to go camping. The whole Lockpick family. It was fun back then, when there was actual fire to roast things over. Why, we almost roasted my Uncle, Theodore Lockpick, my father's brother. He was eaten by a Rancor.
Cassel shrugs, a bit confused.
I found the news kind of strange, considering that I was licked by a Rancor once, and he said I was too small to be a good enough meal, not to mention the bones. He said my Uncle had been a more heavy-set man. He did always like eating s'mores by the campfire.....
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Diva, from Aeons Torn
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Post by Diva, from Aeons Torn on May 19, 2013 20:15:03 GMT -8
Hmm... That's actually a good story. You have more?
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Cassel Lockpick
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Everything is just so interesting . . . remarkably at the same time!
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Post by Cassel Lockpick on May 19, 2013 20:37:12 GMT -8
Cassel, having found very few people who have ever wanted to listen to his stories, smiles and claps, giggling happily. He begins rummaging through his pouches for something, dropping objects around the thread as he walked, mumbling to himself about plot devices and such. The items on the floor range from a toy dart blaster, and a map of the only safe path to Diva's bedroom. Finally Cassel pulls out a journal and flips through several pages, and marks something in it. Closing the book suddenly, Cassel looks up and smiles at Diva.
Why yes! Yes I do! I have so many stories that they tried cataloging them all, and ended running out of room in their recorders! I was once set upon by a recorder person with a tape recorder the size of a Star Destroyer, a very, very difficult thing to carry around, let me tell you...But he did it anyway. He said he had a recording of every event in the history of everything of everywhen. So I asked him; "Why in the world would you want to record people in the refresher!?" The recorder guy just gave me a look and shook his head, and walked away...But he came back a few minutes later with a smaller tape recorder, and told me to share a story, so I told him this one!
Cassel clears his throat and begins his tale. Every action he speaks of, he re-enacts with miming gestures.
When I was a little boy, I wanted to go on adventures, a reasonable request by any young lad of three and a half years old. I imagined slaying dragons with a butter knife! Consequently my mother was rather irked that her butter knife was always covered in lizard guts. She said that killing small animals was some kind of thing that had to do with something else. I don't remember exactly what she said, being three and a half...You understand of course. After a few more years, my mother finally decided to let me go into town, on an adventure to fetch some food from the market! But when I went there, there was a man who was selling the most delicious cookies I had ever seen! I asked the man, "How much are your cookies, sir?" He told me the price and I frowned. He was asking nearly ten credits per credit! Ridiculous prices! Cookie gouging! When he saw my face, he began to explain why he had priced these cookies at such a high price.
Cassel changes his voice to that of a deep-voiced older man.
He began like this..."Now you see these cookies are such a high price because of the materials they're made of! I had to travel halfway around the world, and then the other half for good measure! I made these cookies with the tears of Unicorn colts! The cocoa from the forbidden cocoa tree, and the eggs of the golden chicken!"
Cassel returns to his normal voice.
Obviously this old man was just crazy..I mean.....a cookie made of tears of unicorn colts, forbidden cocoa, and golden eggs? Ridiculous....
Cassel looks over to his peripheral, as if trying to sneak something, and pulls out from one of his pouches a bag of cookies....He smiles innocently.
They just fell into my pouch! I swear I was going to return the cookies, but first I had to get the food my mom sent me to get! So I went further into market, and passed my several strange people, bought the food, and went back home. But I forgot about the cookies! My mother found them, and asked me where I got them, so I told her, and she ate one!
Cassel throws his arms up dramatically.
POOF! My mother turned into a flying rabbit! I was confused! I was puzzled! It was so cute! But my mother began breathing fire....mad that I suggested getting a glass box to keep her in, and I went to the cookie man, and he shook his finger at me.
Cassel shakes his finger and begins speaking like the old man again.
"You'll never cure your mother! That's what you get for stealing my cookies! I'm the only person with the cure, and I'll never give it to you!"
Cassel had a sad look on his face, and returned to his regular voice.
I was distraught. My mother would forever be a fire-breathing flying rabbit! But...
Cassel reaches into another one of his pouches and pulls out a vial of green liquid. He giggles mischievously.
Now that was the only time I actually....well....borrowed something without the intention of returning it. So I gave the cure to my mom, and she grounded me for a month....So I mashed up some of the cookies, put them in her food, and told her that if she didn't un-ground me I'd leave her as a fire-breathing flying rabbit...She agreed, and I cured her once more. She then thought it would be a good idea to play a trick on my father....and long story short my father was turned into a fire-breathing flying rabbit for a couple of years until we found more of the cure.
Cassel bowed.
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Gukky
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I remember... The Major.
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Post by Gukky on May 21, 2013 4:19:38 GMT -8
What have I done?
Wails, hands to the heavens.
It worked surprisingly well. But why? Why Cassel? What madness do you have to make me abandon all common sense and vote for you? And promote you?
And is there a signing bonus? And something to make you stop posting in unreadable green?
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Cassel Lockpick
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Everything is just so interesting . . . remarkably at the same time!
Posts: 118
Affiliation: The Adventure
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Post by Cassel Lockpick on May 21, 2013 4:39:39 GMT -8
My green is perfectly readable! Of course I usually write on using the silver setting for the forum...but I checked it on blue and while it was hard to read it all at once, if you tried to read it like a normal person, one word at a time, it worked out fine. As for a reason to vote for me....well....I can't possibly be terrifying. I don't know what to tell you....Cassel makes a sad face.When I was a little boy, I wanted to go on adventures, a reasonable request by any young lad of three and a half years old. I imagined slaying dragons with a butter knife! Consequently my mother was rather irked that her butter knife was always covered in lizard guts. She said that killing small animals was some kind of thing that had to do with something else. I don't remember exactly what she said, being three and a half...You understand of course. After a few more years, my mother finally decided to let me go into town, on an adventure to fetch some food from the market! But when I went there, there was a man who was selling the most delicious cookies I had ever seen! I asked the man, "How much are your cookies, sir?" He told me the price and I frowned. He was asking nearly ten credits per credit! Ridiculous prices! Cookie gouging! When he saw my face, he began to explain why he had priced these cookies at such a high price.
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Gukky
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I remember... The Major.
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Post by Gukky on May 21, 2013 7:49:25 GMT -8
Ooh, black is pretty...
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The Holy Man
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I'm not a God, but I'll help you meet yours.
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Post by The Holy Man on May 22, 2013 9:39:57 GMT -8
Diva has a quote from the Beach Boys in her status.
That's pretty terrifying.
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Diva, from Aeons Torn
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If blood is the currency of life, then what's its tax collection service?
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Post by Diva, from Aeons Torn on May 22, 2013 14:02:40 GMT -8
Of course I do! Everything I do, I do for you, out of love!
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