Faina Delvardus
The First Order
Posts: 301 
Affiliation: The First Order
Traffic Light: Green
|
Post by Faina Delvardus on Mar 15, 2023 18:52:44 GMT -8
Yvaine, smiling when Fiora jokes with her about making their father spill his water, cannot be sure when, exactly, she becomes cognizant of the fact that their father is, rather than in the process of recovering from his mysterious ailment, making his final farewells in the last moments he will have with them, but by the time he has finished addressing Fiora and Octavian she knows that the world as she knows it is about to undergo a seismic, cataclysmic change from which she feels she stands little to no chance of recovering. So shocked and panicked by the impending loss of her father that she can scarcely take in the last words her father will ever say to her, Yvaine feels herself nodding emphatically all the same even as tears stream down her cheeks while she falls to his chest and clings to him as she sobs out, "I . . . I will, Daddy," even though all she wants to do is shout out that he cannot die, cannot leave her the rest of his family without him.
Faina, her own heart breaking, puts an arm around Yvaine, her maternal instinct warning her that her youngest daughter is close to making a scene that will make Nicademus' final moments more difficult for everyone, surprised to find that she can offer even so small a comforting gesture when all she feels is a numbness akin to shock even though she has known this moment was coming longer than most.
Remus, possessed of a quiet stillness many mistake for a lack of sentiment or emotion, stands at parade rest as his father addresses him last; though he feels the impeding loss of their father every bit as keenly as his siblings, Remus bears the pain stoically as much due to the examples of his parents as to an understanding that it is a final gift he can give to his father to show that he can trust him to be one of the stewards of his legacy. Remus knows that some in his position might feel marginalized or undervalued compared to his elder siblings, but his father never made him feel any less loved or valued than Octavian, heir to the throne, and imparted many of the same lessons and values to him as to his elder brother, and so his father's request being that he serve Octavian well and to serve the nation comes as neither a surprise nor a disappointment. It was Remus' dream, even before Nicademus encouraged and supported it, to be a Naval Commander, to serve and defend the Empire his father built, and so there is no hesitation, only firm resolve in his voice as Remus, with a glance towards Octavian to make it clear that he is making the promise to him as much as to their father, vows solemnly, "I swear it, Father."
After he has spoken, Remus turns when Fiora suddenly apologizes before all but running from the room, his habitually composed expression becoming one of concern; though he and his step-sister have never been particularly close, the decade gap in their ages and her long absences due to her training with the Knights of the Ren preventing them from having much time together, Remus cares for Fiora no less than Yvaine or Octavian, and he looks at his mother with a eyebrow arched to silently ask if he should go after Fiora.
Faina, fighting down her own maternal instinct, as selfish as it makes her feel, as it bids her to go after Fiora herself because she knows that doing so would deprive her of these last moments with her beloved husband, her brow knit in worry for her eldest daughter, hesitates before subtly shaking her head to indicate Remus should stay; she knows Fiora well enough to doubt that anyone could reach her now, or be able to offer any solace or comfort were they to do so. Rubbing Yvaine's back soothingly, her youngest daughter sobbing quietly as she continues clinging to Nicademus, Faina gently squeezes her husband's hand as she looks at him and tries to convey that their eldest daughter will be alright with her expression alone, not trusting her voice to remain free from doubt or traces of her own grief.
|
|
|
|
Post by Nicademus Delvardus IV on Mar 17, 2023 6:33:11 GMT -8
After taking a moment to relax and regain some strength, three more were addressed by the Emperor.
Roland... I still remember the day Brock decided to adopt you. When you came in, I am certain you noticed others present who were confused by my brother's choice of a child from the streets as his son. But surely, you recalled how much I was smiling that day. You, and his wife, the Grand Moff Thul, were exactly what my brother needed to complete his life. Something that I had been egging him to do for years.
It had certainly stunned the court when Brock announced the adoption of Roland and his eventually induction into the training regimen of an Imperial Knight. Yet, his adoption was something that Nicademus knew his brother needed. Many times, in the past, the Emperor encouraged Brock to find a wife, have children, and build a legacy just as Baltasar and him had done. He knew that Brock needed such things and would not take the whole 'I am married to my profession' cause Nicademus had said that line many times in the past. Roland's presence in Brock's life had been such a wonderful thing to see.
It is unfortunate that you did not stay with the Imperial Knights, but I am happy that you are happy. Continue to pursue your path and never falter from it. When you arrived, my son and you were adversaries, but that can be typical of young children. Now, that has turned into a warm and strong comradery. Be a voice to Octavian as you always have been. Never let go of the iron bond you two have formed... for it will last a life time.
Nicademus offers a smile, knowing how the two had become like brothers. Among his companions, Octavian had two that were the most prominent: Roderick Rus and Roland Ferrum. These two were likely to be his Hands, the strongest and most loyal of his supporters. They were both capable with what they did and were more than willing to speak their minds if need be. Octavian would need such people to rule well and wisely.
His eyes now turned to Brock. His expression softened slightly, recalling when Baltasar uncovered a recorded transmission by their father, revealing the parentage of the Imperial Knight to his sons. Brock had been the result of an unknown affair that their father committed, but he had done his best to provide nonetheless. The recording had stated an inheritance, an apology, and encourage to his out-of-wedlock son.
Brock... I did my best to include you in our family as a brother. It is unfortunate you never got to know Azria, your sister. I am certainly she would have been overjoyed to meet yet another brother. Certainly ensuring she remained outnumbered among the Delvardus siblings.
A soft chuckle emits followed by a pause as Nicademus felt the exertion get to him a bit.
You have been an exemplary Imperial Knight, just like my wife and Xeonon Solomon, a champion of our ranks. You have done your duties diligently in protecting this family, educating my children, and managing the Knights as Faina took the role of spouse and mother. Serve Octavian well as you have served me. You were once his mentor and all of my children can never be without more wisdom. Speak to them as Uncle and as Knight. Defend this Empire as you have done for so long.
Brock had his wife and children now. He was set perfectly, just as Nicademus had long hoped for. He could pass on, knowing that Brock had support all behind him... Roland, Standash... what a good family they had become. Now, his gaze turned to Baltasar who stood at the foot of the bed, looking at his older brother. The two looked at one another for a long time before the Emperor spoke.
Baltasar... I still remember us getting into all kinds of trouble as children. We broke the nose of Artemis Motti and fought with that Tarkin boy too during the academy years. Father certainly viewed us as troubled children and did his best to rein us in... it is unfortunate that Azria is not with us today... I dearly miss our sister. We served in the Security Force, then found fortune elsewhere. You have been a strong presence in the Army. Your skill helped reorganize our forces to ensure they were the necessary means to expand, police, and defend our territories.
There was a reason why Baltasar was Grand Marshal after all. The celebrated figure within the Army for his meticulous skill, his commanding presence, and ability to lead his troops. But, there was a reason why Thomas Zahn had been promoted. Nicademus had seen how Baltasar wasn't too kind towards the presence of a new and older brother, Brock, and, at times, could be arrogant. He remembered how he reacted rather strongly to the graduation of his daughter, the Emperor's niece, Amaris, when she joined the Stormtroopers. There needed to be a means to balance things.
Protect this family as you have. See your daughter never falter... and remain good to your nieces and nephews.
With that said, Nicademus exhales deeply, leaning forward as his hand rested upon his forehead. Exhaustion was strong from all the talking, but the Emperor had to endure it. He had to endure it just a little longer to say his final words to the most important of persons within this room. He then spoke softly.
Everyone, please... give me a moment. Leave the room. Everyone, but Faina...
|
|
|
|
Post by Brock Ferrum on Mar 25, 2023 22:05:45 GMT -8
Despite the exhaustion and focus on his task Brock can't help but smile at the shared memory as his brother talks about Roland's adoption following the battle of Coruscant. At the time he had expected to have to fight with the Emperor to bring a street kid from the underworld into the imperial palace, but instead his brother had welcomed Roland with open arms. Somehow his brother had known something that he himself didn't realize until much later, that he needed Roland as much as the boy had needed him. Although not everyone had been as happy about the idea Nicademus's support had never wavered. It was good to be lost in that pleasant memory for a moment before the reality of the situation came crashing back down on him as Nicademus changed the subject and addressed him directly.
Despite the years of training in emotional control and his usually stoic demeanor he can't help but shed a few tears as his brother offers one last request to look after his children. Although he'd had more time to prepare for Nicademus's death than most now that the time had finally come he found he had to draw on every bit of his training to focus and keep himself under control. Rising unsteadily to his feat from the chair that had been brought to him he reached the Emperor's bedside and set a comforting hand on his shoulder. I will look out for them as if they were my own, though I suspect you already knew that. A sad smile crossed his face as he turned to head toward the door. He paused just before the door and turned back toward his brother, a few more tears slipping out from his eyes as his control faltered once more. It was an honor to serve you as an Imperial Knight, but few things have made me as happy as having you for a brother. The galaxy will never be quite as bright as it was with you here with us. I love you, Brother. The sentiment had always been there, but it had always been unspoken. With that the Steward of the Imperial Knights turned and left the room, though he only made it as far as the next room over before dropping cross-legged to the floor focusing all of his attention of the working of healing he still held, determined to give his brother and his best friend as much time together to say goodbye as he could manage.
|
|
Faina Delvardus
The First Order
Posts: 301
Affiliation: The First Order
Traffic Light: Green
|
Post by Faina Delvardus on Mar 29, 2023 20:07:14 GMT -8
Faina's grip on Nicademus' hand tightens ever so slightly when, after speaking with Roland, Brock and Baltasar, he asks that everyone leave save for her; though her husband asks for but a moment, Faina knows that the moment she has been dreading is rapidly approaching, that he asks to be alone with her so that he can stop struggling to cling to life and let himself go without burdening anyone with a final memory of the life departing from his eyes - let them remember him instead in his final moments, telling them of his love for them and offering them his wisdom and guidance for one last time.
As Brock turns to leave, Faina takes a silent, deep breath and does what she can to prepare for what must come now even though she knows that she could never hope to truly ready herself for the profound loss that is to come. The sound of Brock's footsteps seems muted, drawn out, almost dream like as Faina's thoughts become a confused whirlwind of doubt, worry and fear; she doubts her strength to go on when her beloved husband is gone, worries that she has left so much unsaid that she wants him to know about the depth of her love for him and gratitude for all that he has given her in their life together, and fears that she will make his passing more difficult than it needs to be with her grief and her fears. Looking into Nicademus' eyes when they are alone, however, Faina feels her thoughts settle as she takes refuge, however temporary it may be, in duty; her love for him making it seem so simple to focus on doing what she can to ease his passage from this life to whatever lays beyond it, and so she trusts that their life together has left no doubt about her love for him while letting him see only her strength to carry on and be there for their children in her gaze, untainted by her worries about how she will find that strength when he has gone, taking a large part of her with him.
Lifting her free hand and placing it on Nicademus' cheek, Faina summons what she hopes is a loving, reassuring smile as, eyes glistening with unshed tears she squeezes his hand held tightly in hers as she says hoarsely, "They are all gone, my love, it's just us now. You have been a wonderful father, husband, brother and friend, and have given us all that we need to carry on. You can let go now. Be at peace."
Remus watches Brock come from the room his father is dying in, frowning in concern as the Steward of the Imperial Knights drops to the floor and clearly resumes his efforts to sustain his father for as long as he can. For a moment Remus feels as though he is in a play, though he does not know his lines or what he should be doing, but soon recognizes it as his mind's way of trying to soften the impending blow and clenches his fists as he tells himself that he must be strong and carry on as his father would want him to do. Looking from Brock to the others around the room, Remus sees that Yvaine is crying as their "aunts" Nicolina and Ishild comfort her as best they can, catching the subtle nod that Ishild makes towards Octavian to suggest that he stay near his older brother in case he is needed. Remus returns the nod, not sure what he can do for Octavian when he has his circle of trusted advisors and friends to rely on but determined to do as his father asked of him all the same and serve his brother well. Taking a moment to rest a hand on Yvaine's shoulder to let her know that he is there for her if she needs him, Remus then moves closer to Octavian, hands clasped behind his back as he looks back towards the door behind which his parents are having their last moments together.
|
|
|
|
Post by Nicademus Delvardus IV on Mar 30, 2023 16:52:55 GMT -8
Nicademus watched as all filed out of the bedroom. The Emperor taking a good look at all those who left... knowing this would be the last time. Even though he did not have the power of the Force, the Imperial sensed it. His time was coming and these precious seconds had been spent with those he loved. But, whereas others would have wanted to be surrounded to the very end, Nicademus decided otherwise.
...I didn't want the children to see the life leave my eyes, Faina...
He spoke softly after a few moments of silence. His hand slightly gripping the sheets as best he could. Nicademus exhales deeply, knowing he wouldn't be able to meet his grandchildren, to see Remus and Yvaine grow up to their full potential, to see Octavian and Fiora rise higher and become pillars of the Empire... so much was not to be seen, so much to miss out on... the Imperial hoped that he had set the right example for future generations to come.
Slowly, his hand moved, gripping the fingers of Faina's hand firmly as she remained by his side. Nicademus knew he was fortunate deep down. He had raised four children, been married twice, although the first marriage ended with an unfortunate departure, seen an Empire rise from nothing, and become a paramount leader within the galaxy. If he were younger and someone foretold this to him, Nicademus would hardly believe it.
When tomorrow comes, Faina, ensure that Brock and Baltasar execute my will to the letter. Ensure all that were my defenders and lieutenants are brought back to the capital and allow the Empire to mourn. More importantly, with his ascension, allow Octavian to be Grandmaster of the Imperial Knights, just as the Fels before.
Nicademus says, making a final request to his wife. He knew that, with Faina, Brock, and others, Octavian would become a good leader of the Imperial Knights. For long had they been without an Emperor and received one in the form of Nicademus. Now, an Emperor would arise and become not only the leader of the nation they protected, but also their commander as master of the order. A promise would be fulfilled, one given to Xeonon many decades ago when the two first met and conversed about the future.
Slowly, his hand moved, causing Faina's to rise so that Nicademus could kiss it gently.
For me, to be your husband, for nearly thirty years has been... a privilege that is beyond words.
His eyes look now at the Empress.
I have known you longer than anyone else who I have known since coming to Aargau, all those years ago. Even Brock, who had been with the Imperial Knights back then, I did not know yet... but you, I remember our first conversation. You were surprised when I mentioned my education under a Sith Lord. But I assured you that those influences were meant to protect me from others that may seek to use the Force to coerce and threaten me.
Nicademus, back then, was the young Head of State for the Deep Core Remnant. Names, such as Gabriel Solomon, Sarah Dodonna, Xeonon Solomon, and more were still alive and well. They served him directly, seeing to it that the foundations, left by Cade Fel, were not at all wasted but secured and utilized to grow. Nicademus stepped in to be the leader that the remnant of the Second Fel Empire needed to firmly establish itself. It is amazing to think of those days now, almost like in a bygone era. So much had changed, to such a degree that even the Imperial would sit in his office, gaze out at Coruscant, and wonder if it was all but a dream.
I have loved you and always will love you, even into the next life.
The Emperor's voice grew a bit softer.
Know that I will be with you, even though I am gone, Faina. Know that, if there is a next life for us, I will find you again and fall in love with you once more. Fate was most kind to give me such a strong defender, a valiant Imperial Knight, and a loving Empress, who was a mother to all my children and the support I needed to keep going forward.
Nicademus deeply exhales, looking upon Faina for the last time. She had been so much in his life: a loyal Imperial Knight, among those who defended him both verbally and with her blade, the one who helped strengthen the Imperial Knights, and ever so his protector. When his eyes came across her, that time on Muunilinst, he gave love a chance... and it was the right decision. At times, Nicademus had even asked why he hadn't done so sooner, but perhaps, fate believed the time was right for then and not before.
Help me lay down. My head is feeling a little heavy...
The Imperial requests as he begins to move now, seeking to rest upon the bed.
|
|
Faina Delvardus
The First Order
Posts: 301
Affiliation: The First Order
Traffic Light: Green
|
Post by Faina Delvardus on Mar 31, 2023 19:09:51 GMT -8
Stroking Nicademus' cheek tenderly with one hand while the other clenches his hand tightly, Faina nods when he explains why he had asked that they be left alone, whispering to him, "I understand, my love, and then nods again emphatically when he asks that sees to it that his will is carried out exactly as he wishes, It will all be done precisely as you want, my love, I swear it." They have spoken of Nicademus' wishes for the future of the Empire many times throughout their lives, and Faina knows those wishes so well, understands them as well as if they were her own, and vows to herself just as she had to her beloved spouse that she will see them come to pass.
The smile that surfaces on her lips is bittersweet when Nicadmeus speaks of their relationship and his love for her, and Faina cannot keep the tears she has been holding back from falling dow her cheeks as he says that if there is a next life he will find her in it and love her just as he has in the one that he will depart from soon. Just as Nicademus remembers their first conversation and all that came to pass after it, Faina remembers how it was that she first came to know Nicadmeus as a charismatic, determined and brilliant leader that made her take up the mantle of Imperial Knight as her parents had before her, and remembers how her faith and trust and belief in him remained firm even when her doubts about some of the allies the First Order chose gave her pause, and remembers how it was that their relationship evolved and deepened over time; how loyalty became friendship and then bloomed into the love that has bound them for nearly three decades. Time, for Faina, seems too fleeting now, and she finds herself grasping for words to tell Nicademus all that he has been to her, all that their love gave to her; she wants to tell him how were it not for him she would not have known the joys of motherhood, or what it was to be partners with him in a marriage that fulfilled and sustained them both no matter what external strife or challenges they encountered, and it feels inadequate when all she manages to tearfully tell him is, "I can't find the words to tell you how much I love you, so I can only hope that I have always shown you how much I have loved you, and that you have always felt it, known it, she moves her hand from his cheek to cover his heart, in here."
Nodding her head when Nicademus as that she help him lay down, Faina gently moves her hand from over his heart to behind his head and lowers it to his pillow while she smiles lovingly at him and, echoing his words to her, tells him hoarsely, "If there is a next life, my love, she kisses his lips tenderly once his head is at rest upon the pillow, know that I will find you there if you do not find me first."
|
|
|
|
Post by Nicademus Delvardus IV on Mar 31, 2023 21:21:10 GMT -8
Nicademus slowly lays himself back against the bed. His eyes blinking slowly as they looked out at the scenery of Coruscant and the sky of the Imperial Center. He remembered the stories that his father told him of the Jewel of the Core, the Metropolis of the Galaxy. Never, in all his years, did the Emperor ever think he would be calling this place the center of power for a nation he helped found. The thought of those stories brought a smile to his face before his tired gaze turned to Faina once more. His hand holding hers gently as they looked upon one another.
It was in that moment that the Imperial heard something... a soft humming that seemed to come from nowhere. For a moment, it seemed absolutely foreign to Nicademus, until his ears tuned in a bit more. He realized it was his mother, Octavia, humming a song she always did when she worked around the home. It had been years since he had heard that humming tune. Not since his younger years on his homeworld. Slowly, his eyes closed as he took the time to hear it once more. When they opened, his eyes looked to Faina.
You know, Faina, there was one regret I do have...
A soft chuckle emitted from his lips as Nicademus put on his best smile, one last time.
I never got the chance to beat you in sparring...
And with that, his final words were spoken. As the precious seconds passed, the light of his eyes began to fade. The muscles loosened as his head leaned to the side ever so slightly. And the grip upon her hand loosened as the arm slowly went limp. A soft exhale came from the lips of the smiling Nicademus as he finally breathed his last. By the time a full minute had passed, the last bit of life had faded to nothing. The spirit had abandoned its mortal coils and left for the beyond.
The Emperor, Nicademus Delvardus IV, was dead.
|
|
Faina Delvardus
The First Order
Posts: 301
Affiliation: The First Order
Traffic Light: Green
|
Post by Faina Delvardus on Mar 31, 2023 22:57:12 GMT -8
Despite everything, Nicademus' last words, offering an unexpected albeit brief moment of levity in the otherwise solemn and grief laden mood, bring a shaky smile to Faina's lips as she sees her husband's smile one last time, and she emits a single laugh that is part sob when they have been spoken. That he faces death with a smile is a gift that Faina will only appreciate much later, and the moment accompanying the smile seems to pass so quickly, and all too soon Faina watches as the light fades from Nicademus' eyes soon after he speaks, and she holds on to his hand even as she feels his grip on it loosen as he passes on from this life to whatever lays beyond it. Laying her head on Nicademus' head once he has gone, Faina finally lets her grief and loss fully overtake her, sobbing quietly.
When, for now, her tears are spent, Faina collects herself, reminding herself that she has duties yet to fulfill and those outside will be waiting for her. Planting a last kiss on Nicademus' lips, Faina crosses his arms on his chest and pulls the sheet up over his head, then stands and takes a deep breath before walking stiffly from the room.
Her eyes red from the tears she has shed, her voice hoarse from grief, Faina tells those waiting outside haltingly, clearly struggling to say what must be said, "It . . . He's . . . taking another deep breath as she visibly composes herself by seeking refuge in her station and the demands it imposes, Faina says, The Emperor is at rest," unable even now to say that he is gone.
Remus lowers his head, lips tight as he absorbs the news they all knew was coming, but does not move from Octavian's side as Yvaine, tearfully pulling away from Nicolina and Ishild goes to Faina and clings to her as much in search of comfort as to offer it. Faina holds onto Yvaine, numbly offering her words of comfort that feel mechanical even though they are sincere, and she feels just as detached as she nods in gratitude as Ishild and Nicolina offer their condolences and ask what they can do.
All she needs to do, Faina tells herself as everything seems to become muted and distant, is make it through this moment, and then the next, on an on in the hope that eventually she learns to live with the grief that fills and deadens her now.
|
|
|
|
Post by Octavian Delvardus on Mar 31, 2023 23:34:06 GMT -8
When the sobbing was heard, all knew what had occurred. Octavian felt his father's spirit leave his body and ascend to wherever was the next existence. Out of the corner of his eye, the young prince noticed the doctors begin to move. Immediately, the Imperial raised his hand, stopping them from going any further. They may have had a duty to record the time and date of the Emperor's demise, but it wasn't at this second.Leave my mother be.The resolute command was given to the doctors. Among all present, Faina had a most unique relationship with his father. All knew of how she was but a young initiate that joined the ranks of the Imperial Knights when Nicademus first began to climb the ladder to his present position as Emperor. She may not have been family till later, but the trust that his father had had in her was without equal nor without issue. None could match what the pair had together. In Faina, the would-be Emperor had found a trusted companion, a loyal protector, a voice of sound and wise advice, and, eventually, a loving wife and mother of his children. If anyone had the right to grieve first, it was the Empress.
Eventually, Faina did emerge. Behind her, the body of the Emperor was already covered with the bed cloth, indicating his death had come at last. When she pronounced his death, there was an immediate shift in everyone's emotions. Something that Octavian felt resonate throughout the room. All knew that the end was coming, but no one could ever be truly prepared for death... the death of a father, a husband, and the leader of a nation. Tears brimmed upon the edge of his eyes as the reality settled in.
No more would they see the smile of their father. No more would they hear his voice, hold his hands, nor visibly see him... he was gone. Forever.
Octavian's eyes looked beyond Faina, once more at the motionless body of the Emperor, the father of a dynasty and an empire. Then, utilizing the Force, he reached out to his sister, Fiora Ren. His voice spoke to her, knowing that she felt the presence of their father leave this mortal existence.Fiora... he is... gone.
|
|
Fiora Ren
Knights of Ren
Posts: 351
Affiliation: The First Order - The Knights of Ren
|
Post by Fiora Ren on Apr 1, 2023 3:04:41 GMT -8
I know...
Was the single, solitary response that came back from across the Palace, before Fiora shut herself off from further contact. She was where she wanted to be, with who she needed in that moment
|
|
Faina Delvardus
The First Order
Posts: 301
Affiliation: The First Order
Traffic Light: Green
|
Post by Faina Delvardus on Apr 3, 2023 3:52:33 GMT -8
Faina vaguely remembers bits and pieces of the events following immediately after she announced her husband's death, the words of consolation offered by various individuals and the offers to do this or that, and remembers, after what seems at once like an eternity and the veritable blink of an eye, that upon reaching the main living area of their quarters, telling Voshkie and Nechama that she is not to be disturbed unless Octavian, Brock or Baltasar request her presence. With Ishild and Nicolina offering to stay and look after Remus and Yvaine, though both are old and mature enough that doing so isn't strictly necessary, Faina felt little guilt in retiring to her and Nicademus’ bedroom to be alone with her grief while she can given that the next few days will more likely than not require that she mourn publicly as the necessary ceremony attending Octavian's assumption of the throne demands. Though she had thought her tears had been spent, Faina finds them falling anew once she is alone, silently now as she refuses to give way to the sobs that broke from her immediately after her beloved spouse's death; he would not want his passing to break her, and though her strength seems to have faded for the moment, Faina knows it remains within her.
After wandering about the bedroom, touching Nicademus' clothes or other possessions and letting the associated memories wash over her as much tortuously as comfortingly, Faina lays down and, though she feels sleep will elude her, finds herself succumbing to a lethargy that soon gives way to the welcome respite sleep offers, however temporarily.
|
|
Yvaine Delvardus
The First Order
Posts: 56
Affiliation: The First Order
Traffic Light: Green
|
Post by Yvaine Delvardus on Apr 18, 2023 20:56:15 GMT -8
Remus, looking up from the dejarik game he and Ishild are playing with a hopeful, expectant expression when he hears the door open, sighs and slumps down in his seat when he sees that it is his younger sister rather than their older brother, "Oh, it's just you."
Smiling as though unaffected by her brother's less than enthusiastic greeting, Yvaine walks around behind his chair to hug his neck and says, "Just me, yep. So sorry, and then looks at the dejarik board and tells him in a stage whisper, Better watch out for Autie Ishie's Karkath."
Shooing Yvaine away with an expression that strives to be an annoyed one but winds up landing closer to reluctantly impressed that she has spotted something that he had missed, Remus grumbles, "I see it, now get off of me, your wrinkling my uniform."
"Oops, so sorry, Yvaine replies, sounding anything but, and then, after casually mentioning that Ocky might be coming for dinner with Fiora later in the evening to ensure that Remus continues hanging around and then hugging her aunts Ishild and Nicolina, announces to no one in particular, I'll be in my room," before heading from the living area and, once in her room, printing out a copy of the picture Fiora had taken of them together and, after taking an older photo of her and Remus from it's frame to that she can use it for the one she has just printed out.
Heading to the kitchen once she has the photo ready to present to their Mum with Fiora later, Yvaine peers into the pantry, fridge and cabinets to take stock of what they have available so that she can start planning what to make, or possibly rope Nicolina, who is a more talented cook, into making for dinner.
|
|
Fiora Ren
Knights of Ren
Posts: 351
Affiliation: The First Order - The Knights of Ren
|
Post by Fiora Ren on Apr 20, 2023 0:49:06 GMT -8
That Night...As Coruscant Prime set over the Imperial District of Coruscant, Fiora made her way through the private living areas of the Palace from her chambers to those formerly belonging to her Father. Unlike her previous visit, she had changed out of her armour and wore a dark purple dress with shades of black that had a strap over her right shoulder. A dress choice she had manage to make in spite of Jin's fashion advice on the matter. She had let her girlfriend choose her wardrobe once during a punk phase she had gone through. It had been fun, but not a particular fashion she felt comfortable in. Jin wore such outfits beautifully. But for Fiora, if she wasn't in her armour, she had a handful of dresses of various designs which she liked. This purple outfit was one of them.
Aurelia and Vesper accompanied the Princess, having given her space earlier when she had been geared up. But now that she was more casually dressed her guards had refused to let her go alone. Not wishing to fight, she had agreed to being accompanied by two of the Tribune so they would at least be nearby on the very rare and unlikely scenario something bad happened. Her saber was strapped to Aurelia's back just in case. But Fiora was certain she would have no need of such protections as she came to the door. Her guards split off to either side as she knocked on the door to the residential part of the suite
|
|
Yvaine Delvardus
The First Order
Posts: 56
Affiliation: The First Order
Traffic Light: Green
|
Post by Yvaine Delvardus on Apr 21, 2023 19:47:13 GMT -8
The knock on the door is followed by the sound of Yvaine calling out cheerfully, "I'll get it," and the sound of footsteps skipping towards the door.
On the heels of Yvaine's voice, in between the 'it' and the the footsteps, Remus, accompanied by the sound of running footsteps, calls out, "I've got it!"
The "got" is followed quickly by the sound of a body hitting a wall in the hallway leading to the door, that sound followed by an irritated squeak from Yvaine, "Hey! What the actual f. . ."
"Sorry! Remus calls out as he opens the door with an expectant look on his face that fades to a scowl as he sees Fiora and says in a disappointed tone, Oh, it's . . ."
Shoving Remus out of the way, Yvaine smiles as she tells him, "Don't be such a d . . . so rude, Remmy, then smiles as she tells Fiora, Don't mind him, Fifi, come on in, and then waves as she spots her older sister's companions and continues waving to them cheerfully as she tells them, Hi! Ushering Fiora in, Yvaine says, I love your dress!"
Yvaine is about to say something more when Remus gently nudges her to the side, telling Fiora, "Sorry, I didn't mean to be rude. You look very nice."
Yvaine takes one of Remus' hands in one of hers and one of Fiora's in the other and starts pulling them both towards the living area as she tells Remus, "Much better, then grins as she tells Fiora, He was just hoping it was Ocky, that's all. You know how pets do that thing where they wait by the door when their owners are gone, looking all forlorn and. . ."
Remus crinkles his nose and tells Fiora, "I'm not sure I like being compared to a pet, adding, I mean, is it so wrong that I'm concerned about . . ."
Yvaine, releasing her grips on her siblings' hands as they reach the living area, shushes Remus mid-sentence and asks them both, "Ok, so, which of you is in charge of getting Mum out here? I tried earlier and got an 'I'm not hungry, just eat without me', so . . ."
Remus, raising his hands and backing up a step, says, "Oh, It should definitely be you, Fiora, I should stay out here in case Octavian arrives."
Yvaine points out, "I can let him in if . . ."
Shaking his head, Remus reminds Yvaine, "But you're in charge of dinner, remember? Sniffing the air comically, he asks, Is something burning? Smiling and giving Fiora a wink as Yvaine yips in panic and bolts towards the kitchen, Remus admits, I didn't think that would actually work, then gives her a thumbs up as he says, Good luck with Mother."
|
|
Fiora Ren
Knights of Ren
Posts: 351
Affiliation: The First Order - The Knights of Ren
|
Post by Fiora Ren on Apr 21, 2023 22:52:45 GMT -8
It wasn't hard to sense and feel the chaotic energy of her younger siblings as they rushed through the apartment on the other side of the doors to greet their unknown guest. It felt like almost a lifetime ago that her and Octavian had acted like that growing up. Though Yvaine certainly had a much wider repertoire of cuss words that she was ready to launch into than Fiora did at that age. A small smile cross her face before the door opened, before faking a scowl of her own as Remus opens the door
It's nice to see you too little brother...
She slipped in through the door and past the pair of quarrelling siblings, smiling again and a little blush creeping into her cheeks
Thank you Evvy...
She smiles to Remus
Apology accepted Remmy...
Soon, however, she found herself being dragged through the apartment to the living area, while Yvaine and Remus continued to playfully bicker and squabble. Not daring to interject herself until Yvaine rushed off to the kitchen to check in on the food. She ruffled Remus' hair then as he wished her luck
Don't forget you are still a pup, You've got plenty of years yet to grow up in Remus... Octavian is a big boy and can look after himself, and I don't need another brother that has a resting scowl face. Now make sure everything looks nice and help Evvy, as repayment for volunteering me...
She gave the back of his hair a playful flick as she turned across the apartment and headed toward the bedrooms. She'd suspected she would be the one to have to speak to Faina, but that didn't make her any less prepared. She knocked lightly on the door and gently pushed it open
Faina...
She slipped inside, not letting her step-mother deny her entrance and instead imposing herself upon Faina as she leaned back upon the door and closing it
Evvy said I'd find you here.
|
|
Faina Delvardus
The First Order
Posts: 301
Affiliation: The First Order
Traffic Light: Green
|
Post by Faina Delvardus on Apr 24, 2023 20:34:18 GMT -8
Curled on her side beneath the comforter when Fiora enters the room and closes the door behind her, Faina briefly contemplates feigning sleep in the hope of being left to continue pursuing the temporary escape from grief that actually managing to sleep would afford her, and so does not reply immediately to her eldest daughter. As hollowed out, numb, and empty as she feels, a part of Faina knows that the longer she succumbs to the torpor pulling her deeper and deeper beneath the waves of grief the harder it will be to surface from them, and that part tells her now that, if only for the sake of her children, she should make an effort to rouse herself and be there for them, and so she mumbles something inarticulate that makes no more sense to her than it must to Fiora while she tries to summon the energy necessary to move.
Her limbs feel weighted, heavy and clumsy at first, but Faina manages to sit up, emerging from beneath the comforter dressed in the same rumpled clothes she has been wearing ever since being summoned to Nicademus' bedside when his final struggle began. Her first attempt to speak is rewarded with a croak, and Faina absently realizes in a distant way that she is thirsty as well as famished, so she takes one of the cups of tea, brought in by Yvaine or Remus earlier as they checked in on her, sitting untouched and cold on her bedside table, sipping it before looking at Fiora and asking in a concerned tone, "How are you, my little Fee? I'm sorry I haven't . . . she waves a hand around as she tries to complete the sentence, haven't been there for you, or your brothers and sister. It's, she sighs, running a hand through her tangled, bedraggled blonde hair, her voice cracking slightly, just so . . . trailing off and shaking her head, Faina leaves the thought unspoken, hoping that Fiora can understand on some level what she is going through without burdening her with a poor attempt to it into words that could never accurately express what she feels. Setting the cup of tea on the bedside table, Faina swings her legs slowly over the side of the bed and, resting a moment to let the lightheadedness the movement causes pass, halfheartedly jokes mirthlessly, Yvaine is going to be so jealous that you finally managed to get me out of this room rather than her."
|
|
Fiora Ren
Knights of Ren
Posts: 351
Affiliation: The First Order - The Knights of Ren
|
Post by Fiora Ren on Apr 25, 2023 18:54:17 GMT -8
Even if Faina had tried feigning sleep, Fiora would not have been dissuaded from her mission. She could sense with relative ease the presence of one sleeping and one awake. But she waited in silence, allowing Faina a moment to make up her mind on what she was going to do before speaking again. The mumbled noise that came a few moments later indicated her step-mother was going to at least respond. Fiora had been ready for a bit more resistance than what she encountered as Faina slowly rose up to a seated position. But this was at least a good sign that Faina was willing to fight against letting herself be dragged down by the loss she felt.
The truth of the matter was that Fiora knew she couldn't truly understand what her Father and Faina had, nor could she truly fathom the loss gnawing away at her step-mother. However it was not a blissful ignorance of the depression settling upon Faina that drove Fiora. She knew it was there, but like Octavian, she did not want to let it consume Faina. If not just for Faina, but for Yvaine and Remus and the lives they still had ahead of them to live.
Fiora stayed leaning back against the door as Faina roused herself into drinking some, what was definitely cold, tea. She produced a small half smile as reassurance she understand, even as Faina struggled to articulate how she felt in words. She shook her head to head off further failed explanation
I'm fine, I've got Jin to help me manage and Octavian has his cadre of friends and Akulas. Father isn't the first parent we've lost, and we've grown up a lot since Mother disappeared... We have our coping mechanisms worked out. So don't worry yourself too much about us... It's Evvy and Remus I worry most about. They need you now more than ever, so they don't end up like us...
Nicademus' hadn't been a terrible father, but the truth was that he was the Emperor and trying to juggle single parent responsibilities. Between that and the rather pre-determined fates her and Octavian had set forth before them, their lives growing up had not been normal. Grief and loss were dangerous elements to introduce to a growing mind and heart
Besides, it's barely been a day. You're not some super woman that can be with all of us, all of the time...
She finally pushed away from the door and moved to the bed side to offer her hand out to help Faina get up when she was ready
As for Evvy, well... her jealousy will be short lived I'm sure. She is much too kind for that.
|
|
Faina Delvardus
The First Order
Posts: 301
Affiliation: The First Order
Traffic Light: Green
|
Post by Faina Delvardus on Apr 25, 2023 22:04:33 GMT -8
Faina knows that her eldest daughter's words are meant to be comforting, to reassure her that she has not yet failed her children in some way by allowing her grief to overwhelm her to the extent that it has, but cannot help feel on some level that there is a hint of accusation beneath the reassurance all the same; though she had not been in Fiora and Octavian's lives in the immediate aftermath of their birth mother's disappearance, she was their adoptive mother later when they were still young enough that she feels she and Nicademus should have been able to help them cope with the loss. It stings too to hear that she cannot hope to be there for all of her children all of the time, as true as the words are; the reminder of how Fiora, after beginning her training with the Knights of Ren, has never been able to be with her family as often as any of them would like opening the old wound that has never truly healed left by her lingering guilt over not, out of respect for her husband's wishes, having fought against the decision that had been made before she was a part of the twins' lives.
What stings most of all is Fiora's saying that Yvaine and Remus will need her if they have a hope of not ending up like their older siblings, as though Fiora believes that something is wrong with her or her twin despite all of her and Nicademus' love and support, and so, after she takes Fiora's hand when it is offered and stands up, Faina lifts her free hand to cup Fiora's chin and looks into her eyes as she says with a fierce certainty, "There is nothing wrong with how you and Octavian have turned out, Fiora. Your father and I are, her voice breaks the slightest bit as she realizes the error in tense, but she does not feel ready yet to think of her husband in the past tense and so does not correct herself, continuing, both very proud of you both. We always have been. Continuing to look into Fiora's eyes, as though searching for agreement in them, Faina pats her cheek after a moment, moving on rather than trying to force any kind of response from Fiora since she hopes her words have made her own belief clear and does not want to make her daughter feel as though she needs to respond now if she is not ready, instead saying in what is intended to be a light tone, As for worrying, I do not believe I will ever stop. It is a part of being a parent, Faina concludes and then says, Come on, let's join your siblings before they come barging in."
As soon as they step outside, Yvaine pounces on them cheerfully, tugging Remus along behind her as she exclaims, "Mum! then announces, Group hug! as she shoves Remus, looking comically startled towards Fiora while wrapping one arm around Faina's back and the other around Remus' before he can escape and squeezes everyone together tightly. Releasing everyone after a moment, Yvaine bounces over to a bookshelf and takes the wrapped frame containing the picture Fiora took of them earlier while telling Faina escitedly, Fifi and I have something for you, then thrusts the present to Fiora and says, You give it to her, sis'."
Remus, looking a bit grumpy as he adjusts the cuffs of his uniform jacket once released from the group hug, mutters, "No one told me we were exchanging gifts."
"Well, Yvaine sticks her tongue out at him, you weren't with Fifi and I for breakfast, who's fault is that?"
Remus, arching an eyebrow, points out, "Well, I wasn't invited to breakfast was I?"
|
|
Fiora Ren
Knights of Ren
Posts: 351
Affiliation: The First Order - The Knights of Ren
|
Post by Fiora Ren on Apr 26, 2023 14:16:08 GMT -8
She smiles meekly at Faina as her step-mother cups her cheek and tries to reassure Fiora that nothing was wrong and how proud her parents were. Her free hand comes up to gently rest upon Faina's hand as she nuzzles against it a little
Neither of us have lived normal lives... We have both been trained to use the Force and he is about to rule a Empire that spans a third of the known Galaxy... I don't regret it, But they don't have to live it.
She moved her hand clear as Faina gave her cheek a pat and suggested they get moving before Yvaine and Remus started barging in
There are worse things that could happen...
She followed Faina out of the room, before being immediately ambushed by Yvaine and Remus, with the former forcing them all into a group hug. She wrapped one arm around Faina and the other around Remus. Letting go as her younger sister bounced off to collect the wrapped present from earlier in the day which was pushed into her hands. She then wraps one arm around Yvaine to keep her from escaping
Nu-uh, you're not getting out of this...
Waiting for Yvaine to take hold of the present with one hand, she then presents it forth
A small present from Evvy and myself.
|
|
Yvaine Delvardus
The First Order
Posts: 56
Affiliation: The First Order
Traffic Light: Green
|
Post by Yvaine Delvardus on Apr 26, 2023 18:35:59 GMT -8
Fiora's assertion that she and her twin have not lived normal lives echoes thoughts that Faina, having had them herself, understands all too well; how many times had she worried about how having their futures planned out for them even before they were born could affect Octavian and his sister, or about how being Force sensitive came with inherent dangers that it was all but impossible to protect them from now matter how they were trained to use it, or about all the innumerable things that a parent worries about their children having to face as they grew older and protecting them, which could pose it's own dangers if done too much or too little, became more and more difficult? Though she finds Fiora's declaration that she does not regret how she has lived of some comfort, Faina does not linger long on the subject as she senses a degree of wanting to let it lay in her daughter's words that she chooses to respect.
While either may notice it, Fiora and Yvaine get the smile they hoped to get from their mother when, after the group hug, Faina watches her daughters trying to reach an agreement on which of them will present her with the gift they have for her. "Thank you, Faina says, resting a palm on Fiora and then Yvaine's cheeks before opening the framed picture of the two of them together. Smiling as she looks at the picture for a moment, clearly touched to see her daughters looking so happy together, Faina tells them, It's lovely, thank you both," and kisses them each on the cheek.
Yvaine, laughing at Remus' expression as Faina kisses his cheek too lest he feel left out, holds up a hand, palm facing Fiora as she asks, "You saw, right? We did it, Fifi! Go us. Thinking of something that Remus can share with their mother to make him feel more included, Yvaine prompts him, Oh, tell Mum about your news, Remmy."
Remus, as though making a presentation, clasps his hands behind his back and announces, "I found out this afternoon what my first posting will be. Ensign aboard the Hestia, an Ardent-class frigate under the command of Captain Hahn. Aunt Ishild speaks quite highly of him, and says that he is an excellent mentor. I hope to make it to the lieutenant tier in less than the usual . . ."
Yvaine, feigning a yawn as Faina hugs Remus in congratulations with what seems to Yvaine to be an expression that somehow manages to be both proud and concerned - no doubt by the idea of Remus finding himself in combat - tells her brother in a tone perfectly matching the eye roll accompanying it, "We don't need to hear your five year plan, Remmy, sheesh. Looking over at Fiora, she asks a rapid fire set of questions, Is it too early for the hors d'oeuvers? Did Ocky say whether he'd be making it tonight? If so, we could wait, right? Crinkling her freckled nose as she decides what else she could be doing as hostess, Yvaine asks everyone, Can I get anyone something to drink?"
|
|
