Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
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Post by Nel Bukk on Mar 28, 2016 16:43:23 GMT -8
"My opinion on them, Master?" There was a slight amount of hesitation, but not out of fear of him, per se. It was more hesitation out of being overheard by the ones she was about to criticize. Would that still result in more punishment to come? The thought didn't cross her mind, really, but she still glanced back over her shoulder, as if to confirm that yes, they were the only ones there. "Phantom is a loose cannon with far too much power then I feel comfortable having in a mad man's clutches. Tyrana is flaky at best; she wasn't there long enough for me to get a comfortable gauge on, unfortunately. Aysa... Well, I like her and she could make a good ally if thinking logically. I at the very least feel comfortable around her. She's strong, has an intelligent mind to back up her pretty looks, and I think I can learn a lot from her, Master."
She ran a hand through the lower portion of her hair as she tried to get her thoughts together. Her mind was reeling as she thought this through. If she spoke too quickly, she would stumble and make a fool of herself. She carefully sat on her own knees next to her Master, "Ver'metus... He... something is off about him, but he could make a potentially potent ally as well. He seems to have some amount of brain to back up his proverbial brawn."
"As for Ferinus, he needs not to be judging before he even knows all of the facts. He seems in league with Phantom, so we need to watch him. He is his own person, but we cannot be too cautious... And I want to beat the newcomer - Makhai, I believe his name was? - into a pulp and take him down a peg or two, but any attempt at this moment to do so would result in my own defeat rather then teaching the fool anything."
Was she missing anything? Her eyes shifted to the mind ahead of her as she flipped her hair over her shoulder again, her eyes on her Master to try and read his expression. "I feel..."
What exactly was she feeling? Nel stopped in her mental tracks, her brows furrowing together and her head lowering some, her gaze down and to the left as she considered. Her stomach was knotted, and a tightness gathered in her shoulders. Her skin prickled into bumps. She swallowed discreetly at the look in his eyes. She felt intimidated, that was for sure! "I... I don't know for certain what I feel, Master. Apprehensive... fearful... Worried. I believe that is the most forefront emotion right now. I... This is a lot to take in, and I fear we might not be in the best position to make any sort of grandiose moves like some of the others are keen on. Especially with Makhai in our midst now. He's truly an idiot. But... I also feel intimidated by these powerful people. They are bright flames of lit candles and I am a barely sputtering, gasping flicker."
The woman stopped talking for a breath, and to wait for her Master's reaction. If he wanted her to, she would elaborate more, but she wanted to see if her thoughts were well founded or if she needed to step back and re-evaluate what she was thinking.
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
Posts: 77
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Post by Nel Bukk on Mar 21, 2016 18:47:06 GMT -8
Already, everyone seemed more keen of the newcomer, especially with his heritage announced. The names meant nothing to her, and at the same time, something twisted in her stomach. Was she... jealous of the buffoon? Mere minutes ago she had been happy to have the attention off of her, but now... this was like back at the academy, and while she had been happy for her friend, the near constant center of attention he had been, she felt no sense of pride towards this individual, and her hackles raised in her mind. Makhai. She'd have to remember that for the future and do her own research when given a moment to herself. One by one, though, the other's left, and Nel slowly let her own presence grow again. It was small compared to the rest on the ship, but it was there regardless.
Her Master's words broke her from her unintentional glaring at Makhai's back and she started, her gaze snapping to the Nagai male who stood next to her. Stormro mentioning her and him leaving made her slowly push to her feet, the box clutched to her chest now as she pushed the chair back in. Why did Makhai bother her so much? He was an idiot compared to Joruun, with no grace. But that still didn't answer it entirely... This was going to bother her, and she tried while she walked to push the emotion away and into a small box in her mind. Peace. Where was her inner peace?
She fell into step behind her Master, her shoulders drawn up protectively around her ears as she mentally searched for an answer and for a place to shove the raw emotion away to. It wasn't working, though, and that further puzzled her. Kriff.
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
Posts: 77
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Post by Nel Bukk on Mar 13, 2016 11:52:06 GMT -8
For once, Nel was happy with who her master was as she listened to Ver'metus scold his apprentice. The idea of death did not appeal to the young woman and she cast her eyes out over the one being scolded. Her eyes narrowed in suspicion. If what Ver'metus said was true, then how stupid was this man? She kept her mouth shut, though. Many here probably viewed her the same. Absently, she wiped at her nose, as if reminded of her own idiocy earlier. She listened, though she acted like she wasn't. She needed to know the name of the man she needed to avoid, or else be dragged down with him. She mentally paused. Was she really viewing herself as better as him? That was an interesting change.
She glanced back, however, as more voices joined in, and then the Zabrak looked to her Master as he piped in. Secrecy. Yes. They needed secrecy for this to take effect and to hold without being noticed. And with the apprentice, she worried that wouldn't happen. Not if he was going to broadcast something like that.
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
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Post by Nel Bukk on Feb 26, 2016 19:42:17 GMT -8
Nel subtly watched Ferinus out of the corner of her eye, her brows furrowed gently before she looked to Aysa as she spoke as well. The anger was justified, and it was a warranted point as well. As her fear of the others ebbed away (they hadn't attacked her yet, and though she was still guarded, she felt more comfortable with them), she felt capable of speak her opinion more, but Aysa... Well, her concerns were allayed by her Master, and so she turned her attention back to the window. The zabrak watched everyone in the little reflection it offered, her hands tucked behind her back, the box now under her arm. She had a stake in what was going on, true, but there was nothing being directed at her specifically, and so she kept her mouth shut.
Still, Ferinus' behavior had her worried. He and Phantom had her the most concerned of all those she had met this day, and Ferinus... well, he seemed on edge and not quite present in the conversation. The others also seemed to have taken notice, so she once more kept her opinion to herself. There was no reason to stir things up more. Let them fight among themselves and sort themselves out. That was the best she could do for right now. She listened to her Master speak, nodding some to show she heard and understood him before she shifted the box into her hands again and returned to her seat at the table, tucking her head down to make herself seem smaller, although that was unintentional.
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
Posts: 77
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Post by Nel Bukk on Feb 20, 2016 17:45:17 GMT -8
It had been getting crowded in the room, with everyone talking with someone else in the room. She wasn't a threat, and so she had been forgotten. For some reason, that bothered her but... it didn't at the same time. She mentally frowned as she tried to puzzle through that conflict, although her senses still kept on alert. Phantom was still putting her on edge, and he seemed in a foul mood, whereas the new apprentice seemed to catch everyone's attention far more then she had. None of this really had anything to do with her. However, she still paid attention, in case she needed to interject some reason into the madness. The Zabrak wasn't sure if such a gesture would be appreciated, but still, their plan did hinge on them working together rather then independently.
Nel's head lifted as she sensed her Master come into the room and she turned to look at him, hoping she wasn't in trouble for staying behind. If she was, he seemed more interested in the planet they had arrived at. Still clutching the box, afraid to let it go, she walked to one of the windows to look out. Her eyes widened at the collision and release of electricty, a look of wonder crossing her features as she turned her attention back to the man who was willing to teach her. The history of the place was fascinating to the young woman, and if he were to look over, he'd see he had her rapt attention. She nodded at his emphasis of secrecy. She wasn't likely to tell anyone, though... She glanced at the others in the room. Ty made her worry in that regard. Something about the woman's behavior... Nel wouldn't be surprised if they were discovered because of Ty.
"A good plan, Master. If anything were to go wrong, it's best to have a place to fall back to to lick our proverbial wounds. If what you're saying is true, then any after us would be definitely hard pressed to find us if we chose to disappear from sight." She spoke with as much respect as she could manage, but at the same time, her tone wasn't meant to be taken as fawning or boot-licking. She was genuine in her opinion that having a back up plan was a good idea. Any number of things could go wrong, and having a place to withdraw to if they did would be beneficial.
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
Posts: 77
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Post by Nel Bukk on Jan 29, 2016 11:48:54 GMT -8
Nel quietly watched everyone as the group slowly came back together. Her shoulders hunched up around her ears protectively, and she held onto the ornate box both defensively and protectively. It was an anchor, an unthought of connection to her Master, who was currently busy elsewhere. That amount of power... She glanced over her shoulder to the door before she once more looked around at everyone. A new power base would be needed, yes, but where? Judging by how everyone was reacting, there was someone aboard that other ship that they did not like. And Ver'metus had an apprentice? It looked like she wasn't going to be the only one receiving training now. Good. Maybe it would mean some of the attention of the others onto them and instead of on to her. That suited her, as that much pressure, with so many that could easily put her on the ground if she wasn't careful, was daunting to say the least.
The Zabrak only hoped that someday she could stand on par with these individuals... or at the very least, stand on par as her Master. The amount of power he held hidden inside of himself was incredible to her and she inwardly flinched at how... weak she was in comparison. But the others had a point. If he was training her, then there was bound to be something there that he saw. She just needed to find that herself.
Her fingers squeezed the box again, a small smirk crossing her face before it was gone again at Aysa's comment to Phantom. Oh, if only she could get away with such a comment herself. That in and of itself lit her up inside as she tried hard not to smile. The situation was tense, but there was a certain exhileration to it as well. She was on the proverbial sidelines now, but in time, that would change. She was in no real hurry to change it.
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
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Post by Nel Bukk on Jan 19, 2016 10:06:33 GMT -8
The Zabrak couldn't help but sigh at Ver'metus's comment about Phantom's wrath. He had a point for certain there, and a small amount of pride at Stormro choosing her to spend his time on. If what he said was true, then she certainly had to have some potential, right? Her shoulders squared some, but her eagerness was more tempered now then it was a few moments before. It seemed now was not the time to ask what she wanted to, as activity was certainly picking up, but if the man wanted her to ask a question, then so be it. "How-"
Ferinus came in at that point, however, rendering her question moot, really. "I... don't really know. Master just left to deal with something important, but I don't know the details yet."
She then turned to Aysa as the other woman spoke, and a soft, faint smile crossed her features as she listened. Something about Aysa's words hit just the right chord in her that really made her nerves settle down. Confidence. Passion. She once had those in spades. What happened to it? Right. She knew exactly when. Aysa then turned her attention to trying to figure out what was going on and Nel turned her attention inward, her grip on the box loosening again.
Yes, she still had her issues, and she still had the mental scarring to work through, but she could at least pretend to have some modicum of confidence in herself and what she was doing, right? What also helped her nerves was Belbe walking in at that moment, and for some reason, the ability to withdraw back out of the limelight made her feel safer, and in turn, a bit more sure of herself. She had been left alone for a year and survived on her own (even if her Master had been nearby), and because of that, solitude had become a nice companion at times. If she was alone, no one could judge her for what she did. She listened though, as Belbe spoke, shaking her head when asked if there were questions. "None I can think of, at least."
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
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Post by Nel Bukk on Jan 10, 2016 19:01:50 GMT -8
The more Ver'metus addressed her, the more the Zabrak felt herself withdraw again. She had tried to word things as diplomatically as she could and it would seem it had backfired on her. She had not wanted to seem so... picky with her words, but her eagerness to learn had been tempered in the past. She had not wanted to seem overly interested, either, but all of that was for not, it seemed. Her fingers clutched at the box again. 'Should you make it to the end...' That phrase played over and over in her mind, and Nel couldn't help herself from visibly swallowing in distress before she looked to Aysa as she too spoke. Entitlement? She could tell the woman about entitlement she had seen amongst her peers... fire played in her memories and she shut her eyes a moment to regain herself. Not here. Not now. Being the center of attention was not the time to be remembering everything falling apart around her. Another shudder through the ship and her knuckles turned white on the box before the apprentice forced herself to relax. It wasn't worth damaging it to be so... tense.
And then her master's own words felt like a slap across the face. She inhaled through her nose, her shoulders tensing more and it took all she had not to have them come up to her ears. Instead, one of her hands shifted from the box to her leg and dug her nails into the flesh through the body suit. Something to focus on beside the spike of fear in her system. Before she could find something to say though, the man next to her stood abruptly and excused himself. Was that really how meetings were conducted with the Sith? One merely left when they grew bored? She went to follow, but something tugged her back down into her seat and she sighed. No. Best not to follow without express orders to. Her eyes flashed to the other two, however and she swallowed again, feeling much like a piece of meat available for predators to gorge on. The Zabrak took a deep breath as she turned in her chair again to face the only two left, her gaze still on where her Master had left... and then she felt it. His power, and she withdrew internally away from it, to once more hide herself. Today was not a good day for her. What was going on? "Um... I would like to apologize for my outburst earlier, before Master had deemed fit to correct my mistake."
Nel was referencing her face meeting the table, but it just seemed appropriate to apologize for it regardless. The look she gave them was apologetic, even, her lip quirked up some and her eyebrows drawn back in worry. "And I'm still adjusting to being allowed to ask so many questions again. My tongue sometimes gets the better of me and wags before I'm ready."
She looked away from the pair, back to the door, pulling her lower lip between her teeth as she looked back to the door, as if it was the most fascinating thing in the room now.
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
Posts: 77
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Post by Nel Bukk on Dec 20, 2015 21:59:13 GMT -8
The Zabrak lifted her head sharply as her title was spoken, her gaze flitting to her Master and blinking in surprise. Her thoughts ground to a halt as she was suddenly thrust into the center of attention once again. What was it about her that she kept doing that kept drawing his attention? If she knew that, she could change it, but she dared not ask that, not here in front of the other two. Her foot shifted slightly under the table, as if readying to bolt, but the rest of her seemed calm... save her knuckles that gripped at the box in her lap. Those were white on the box, another sign of her emotions that she mostly kept from her face. "I..."
She stopped and took a breath as her thoughts began to order themselves again. Nel looked from her Master and smiled at Aysa. "I have a lot of questions I would like to ask, but I'd be afraid of boring you."
It wasn't an outright lie, actually. She did have many questions, like a child would for an elder sister after not seeing her for a while, but she also had no idea how to word them without getting into some form of trouble or another. Her smile gained a more genuine note, even, as she relaxed marginally. "You are just so... fascinating and it would be an honor to get to know you better. And you as well."
She turned to Ver'metus with the last part of her statement, her hands loosening now on the box she held onto, before looking back to Aysa again, going quiet though as Aysa addressed Ver'metus. She leaned back in her seat, trying to keep her composure as best as she could given her surroundings. She felt on edge, even now, but it had nothing to do with what was in the room with her. That anger she had felt still bothered her on some level, but she slowly pushed herself back out, making herself bigger again, but she was hesitant to become too much of a target.
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
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Post by Nel Bukk on Dec 7, 2015 14:55:53 GMT -8
Nel quietly slid the box back towards herself, his warning sitting heavily on her as she put it in her lap, which was the best place she could think to protect it at the moment. The high cost of its contents made her adrenaline spike as her imagination went into overdrive as to what exactly was in the case she now had in her care. She swallowed back her nerves as best she could, too tired emotionally to really try and hide it anymore as she merely listened to what the more... accomplished individuals had to say. She was merely an observer, taking in all of the information that was being presented and tucking it away somewhere in her mind for later. One never knew when knowledge would be useful, and on top of that, the young Zabrak liked to learn as much as she good. Granted, much of that was a need to read and learn that way, but other methods were equally important. She said nothing though, merely nodding to Aysa as the other woman finished speaking.
It had been an interesting evening, after all, even if she had been merely listening and keeping her head down as best as she could. Trickles of fear edged in on her as her mind still played with what could have been in the box, but she tried not to pay any attention to the emotion. Fear was useless to her right now, and would only make her a further target if her Master took notice of it. That was something she didn't want right now. Nel needed time to think, to process, to figure out where she went wrong and how not to do it again. The problem had been she had let loose her tongue when she had been told not to, and she inwardly cringed at the mistake. She was still learning her place, it seemed. Perhaps silence would be her best friend in the future, as her talking only led to punishment in one form or another. She glanced to Stormro as he fell silent, surprised at the momentary quiet. She wanted to say something, but she held her tongue. The apprentice hadn't been spoken to, and so she dared not say a word again. No amount of words was worth pain, or another visit with the table's top.
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
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Post by Nel Bukk on Nov 19, 2015 23:09:47 GMT -8
"Mark my words; once I have finished with her Nel shall be a potent Sith who can stand beside us as our equal..."
Nel blinked at those words, at the actual mention of her name by her Master as she entered the room again with the box in hand, unopened. Given how he continued, he must not have noticed her. That meant nothing to her, really, as she knew that unless he was focusing on her, he paid no attention to her at all. Not unless she messed up in a big way. It didn't help she had still kept herself small mentally. The Zabrak quietly took her spot again next to him and slid the box across the table for him. She hadn't even taken the time to clean up her face, she had been in such a rush to get what he had requested back to him. Blood still somewhat stained under her nose, and after she took her hand from the box, she wiped at the drying, itching the blood away as best as she was able. Phantom's anger rolled over her and it took a lot to suppress the shudder and the further withdrawal into her own mind. Phantom wasn't mad at her, but someone else. "Master."
The word was said merely to draw his attention to the fact she was back and had gotten what he had requested. She swallowed, trying to shake off the anger. She focused her attention on what her Master was saying instead, her fingers coiling in her lap now as she waited for him to conduct his business. Her mind wandered some, though, wondering what was in the box, and her shoulders squared with tension as her mind thought of more and more possibilities, none of which she really liked.
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
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Post by Nel Bukk on Oct 23, 2015 17:53:29 GMT -8
Initially caught up in the conversation, Nel started as her master's attention at least momentarily turned to her. She looked at him, worry niggling at her thoughts at that sadistic grin that spread over his lips. A sense of foreboding filled her, but she nodded nonetheless and pushed back from the table, her firewater still untouched on the table in front of her. "Yes Master. I will return as quickly as I am able."
His dismissal of her was not unusual. She was practically nothing to him as it was. She mentally paused as she barely caught that tiny amount of venom. She winced and hurried after Belbe. Master was not happy with her, if what he said was true. Of course, she was misinterpreting the reason for his bitterness, but she had no other ground to go on to say otherwise. With that in mind, the young woman hurried her pace to get to what her Master had requested. Why had he asked her not to look? That hadn't been part of her original plan, but now... now there was a curiosity at being told what not to do. She wanted to look, but she knew her punishment would be worse if she had.
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
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Post by Nel Bukk on Sept 14, 2015 20:09:44 GMT -8
Nel graciously took the cloth from the other with a quiet thanks, using water provided by a service droid to wash the blood from her face. With the healing, there was no more pain (the nerves had calmed down, thankfully), and swelling was no doubt nonexistant. That just left the blood. It wasn't her place to add to the toast, and so she kept her head down. As she was introduced, she bowed her head towards Aysa. "A pleasure to make your aquaintance, Miss Aysa."
She hoped she wasn't stepping beyond her bounds again, and she cast a quick glance to Stormro to see if she'd be punished again. If nothing else, she was being polite, a small smile on her face. It was a look of innocence, and that was not the intent, but she was simply trying to keep herself out of trouble. Her shoulders were slowly losing their squared stance, especially as she was put in the spotlight between the two. Once she was finished cleaning herself up again, she offered the cloth back. "Would you like this back? I'm sorry for the mess on it. My tongue gets ahead of my mind sometimes."
She turned her attention back to her Master though as he posited the question again. She felt a chill run down her spine at the grin he gave her. Regardless her decision, she would be in trouble, judging by that look. Her other hand twisted in her lap, gathering up some of her 'skirt' into her palm out of nerves for the future. Her lip went between her teeth for a moment as she considered, before she answered. "I would rather not. I still have plenty of marks from it at the moment."
She stopped herself from adding more, as the offer for an alternative had been said in the privacy of a mental communication. She tried to soften her words with another smile to show she was attempting to be playful. And still, her body was beginning to pump adrenaline again... readying to make herself small in case he lashed out. "I would like to try my luck with the alternative you mentioned."
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
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Post by Nel Bukk on Aug 24, 2015 6:45:06 GMT -8
The Zabrak's mouth opened in a silent yelp of pain, her eyes shutting tight. She wanted to swat at him and protect her vulnerable nose, but not in front of the others. That would once again lead to her needing to be made a show of once again. For some reason, that rankled her, but she was glad for the wash of healing energy, and her eyes lingered shut for a moment longer to enjoy it. By her standards, she wasn't much to look at, but that possibly only benefitted her in regards to hiding in the background. She nodded to show she understood, though she wondered what in all the worlds she had of luxury to offer him if the need arose that she needed more healing. She had nothing of value on her or in her possessions save for her friend's saber at her side and her own that Stormro kept hold of. Which left her the option to get better and to improve enough that she cold heal herself.
Humiliation still stung at her, fueling an anger that had sparked to life at his condescension, at his blatant disregard for her. Something swirled in her, and she wanted to lash out, but she instead turned back in her seat, to the drink Aysa had poured for her as well as for everyone else. Her eyes flitted around at all that remained. No one had noticed, or had cared really, at what had happened, and that too fueled the anger that she was having trouble containing. The bigger the flame got, the more she wanted to lash out. She wasn't like any of these people here. She was weak compared to them, and she inhaled through her nose, tucking back the anger a little bit. There was a time and place for it, and though her knuckles whitened as she curled a hand into a fist under the table, now wasn't that time or place.
"Forgive me for speaking when you had told me not to... although my willingness to speak seemed to result in my punishment, so that seems to be a bit of a contradiction." Something had shifted in her as the anger came out. She was daring to sass him, if only in this mental connection. It was a risk and she couldn't help it. Her shoulders squared out and her spine straightened. "What do I even have of luxury to offer you if I needed healing again?"
The anger had chased away almost all of her submissiveness and humiliation, though she hung onto some of the latter to remind herself of why she was angry in the first place. Though she still felt a need to cower from the man next to her (her fist tightened even more in her lap, her nails biting into the flesh of her palm at the reminder), she needed to set an example of what he was capable of teaching someone. Any failure on her part reflected poorly on him, and Nel hoped she could repair what damage she had wrought by her wagging tongue. Beneath all the cowering and bruises, there was a strong willed, intelligent woman willing to push her bounds, and despite the fear she had of the male next to her, there was also a loyalty he had forged in her by the fact he hadn't given up on her.
Her eyes drifted across the table, and she held her tongue. She wasn't being spoken to, and she didn't want to draw more attention to herself, and so she just sat there, taking in all she could as she had been doing before she had spoken up in the first place.
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
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Post by Nel Bukk on Jul 30, 2015 13:47:59 GMT -8
It looked like Nel wasn't the only getting into some form or another of trouble. She quietly listened to Phantom scold the strong willed woman, listened to the woman lash back. She shuddered. She wouldn't have gotten away with such behavior. Her master would have done far worse if she had done that in front of others. That was the primary difference, though. She was an apprentice. The other woman was not. In a way, the other woman was free to do as she wished. As her adrenaline calmed and her fear began to lessen, she realized she had done two things. Two things she hadn't noticed before. Whereas the withdrawing herself mentally thing was something she did from time to time, she never thought much of it given her presence was so slight to begin with. The fact he was pointing it out, however, was intriguing. Was it really that much of an accomplishment?
The barrier, though, completely took the young lady by surprise. It was weak, but it was there. Amazing. Qucikly, she followed it back to its source, and for a moment, she forgot he was there as she tried to figure out how to do it again. How to make it stronger. This was something she always did when she managed a little bit of success. She studied and took it in, trying to figure out how to replicate the result in the future. It faded, though, the barrier and she finally remembered he was there. She was quiet for a long, long moment, taking in his words.
Stormro terrified her sometimes, with how much stronger he was compared to her. In a way, he seemed to be nothing more then a bully, but on the flip side, he was doing what was best for her. He was trying to make her stronger. She focused her gaze on a spot on the table, merely listening to everything going on around them."For speaking out of turn and defending you. It won't happen again."
She noted his allowance, but now wasn't the time to make the decision. She more was worried about her nose. It was beginning to dawn on the Zabrak that it was hurting far more then it should have been. Dammit. Her nose was broken, or severely bruised. She seriously hoped for the latter. She didn't need another reason to be perceived as inept in her Master's eyes. In deference to him, she kept her eyes away and down, still staring at that one spot on the table.
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Nel Bukk
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Post by Nel Bukk on Jul 6, 2015 19:06:27 GMT -8
Her eyes narrowed at Ferinus, but the only thing else she did was grind her teeth together to keep from speaking more. There was no reason else to add fuel to the fire, and she had already spoken once out of turn. She didn't need to do it again. She made a note to avoid the man if at all possible, though if her Master wished it, she would put on a smile and try to get along with the bastard.
Nel's blue eyes flitted to Phantom as he spoke as well, and honestly, she did not doubt that she wasn't ready to rule a country by herself. She wasn't educated enough in the ways of doing so, and she had no qualm with following in her teacher's shadow to learn. How else would she be able to gain the knowledge and experience to potentially do it in the future?
As Aysa spoke, she found a very faint smile crossing her lips. She liked this woman, and a part of her wanted to be like her someday. Unafraid to say what she wanted to say, despite the opposition. That lack of fear-
The silence was Nel's only warning before her hair was grabbed and her face met with the tabletop. Pain and panic reared and surged in her, freezing her body in place. Her fingers dug into the arms of the chair she sat in, knuckles white and hurting from such a tight grip on the material. Her eyes were wide as her head was yanked back, and her heart slammed against the back of her ribs quickly. Pressure on her throat made her still even more. If she didn't fight, it was less of a scramble to get her mind working again. She didn't whimper, nor make any sound other then strangled attempts to breathe. As he mentally bore down on her, all anger and all there and not giving her room... she retreated. The Zabrak mentally pulled away from everything, making herself mentally as small as she could manage. So much fear and wanting to get away from him... and a mental wall went up. She had tapped into the Force in her feeble attempts to get away, and had unconsciously managed that much. It wasn't powerful by any means, and would barely even stop him... but the worst of it was possibly the fact she hadn't even noticed she'd done it. Finally, she could breathe again and she ducked her head down, trying her best to ignore the pain as she breathed through her battered and bruised nose.
She'd thought she had been defending him, and if defending him got her that kind of reaction... Her shoulders rolled in to protect her neck, even if deep down, she knew it wasn't going to do a damn thing if he decided what he had done wasn't enough. A repetitive string of apologies still rang in her head, circling around again and again. Even if he wasn't listening, even if he wasn't paying attention, the apologies were still there. Apologies for speaking out of turn. Apologies for not being good enough. Apologies for not being strong enough.
Her fingers still gripped at the arms of the seat, her eyes staring, unfixed, at a spot on the table. A red spot that looked wet. Slowly, her fingers found enough movement, enough will, to move on their own, and she dabbed at the spot under her nose. Red stained her pale fingertips and she glanced to her teacher. He wouldn't care that her nose was bleeding, but she wasn't quite sure what she needed to do about it. If she excused herself, she would be punished for making him look bad again - had that coming already, she knew - or stay and make a mess and result in the same... She swallowed, and even as her body lightly trembled, she tore a small piece of her halter off. The frayed edges of the material made it an easier thing then if it was brand new, mercifully, and she tried to be as quiet as possible. It was amazing how subdued she got when her Master punished her, and this wasn't even the main 'event' so to speak. Quietly, she pressed the material to her nose, trying to stem the blood and being subtle while she was at it... though with the loud sound of her head hitting the table, that was probably unlikely.
What scared her most, though, was not being judged by these Sith, but rather, the disappointment and anger she had felt come from her Master. Nel swallowed again. Everything hurt right now, and she pushed aside the strange and unwelcome tingling that came with whenever he choked her or pulled her hair in such a fashion. That was something she didn't need to explore. No, she felt her failure weighing down on her, forcing her spine to bend as if an actual weight was on her. She flinched, both mentally and physically, at the subtle threat that their training session was.
She bit her tongue, literally, to keep from making any noise other then her faint attempts at breathing. This was going to be a long meeting...
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
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Post by Nel Bukk on Jun 15, 2015 7:43:54 GMT -8
"I swear, Master, I did not broadcast anything as they claim I did." There was desperation in her mental voice, a slight note of panic even. Her thoughts became turbulent as she began to doubt herself. Physically, however, her hands clenched in her lap, her fingers digging into the opposing hand as a distraction from the budding anger. Even as she worried about disappointing her Master, there was rage and indignation at their prying. She tucked her tongue between her teeth to keep it from flying. The carefully crafted words she had formulated fell apart at Phantom's words. No... She had been punished enough. She had been disciplined enough. She was good enough. She wouldn't... "There needs to be a reason for killing, whether to further our cause or to keep an enemy off our back. Needless killing fulfills neither. As for my disciplining, it has been adequate. I have plenty of bruising to prove it. Now, if we can go back to the task at hand, I believe my Master asked a question." Her nails dug into the back of her hands, and she kept her head down, avoiding eye contact. It was all she had to not lash out. She had remained surprisingly calm... at least, verbally. There was relief her master could feel. Relief that she had managed to fake a smile, so to speak. "It might not mean much, as I'm his apprentice, but I do believe Adumar might be our best option at this junction."
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
Posts: 77
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Post by Nel Bukk on Jun 8, 2015 8:24:33 GMT -8
Nel felt her eyebrow twitch as Ferinus spoke of killing Jedi. Was killing them his only real goal? She found herself literally biting her tongue to keep from saying something she would regret. Killing for killing's sake didn't sit well with her and she paused. What was she thinking? She glanced to Stormro. He was really starting to rub off on her, if her thoughts went to that rather then thinking killing at all being a good idea. The purple glow distracted her from her thoughts and then... The Dark Seed. It sent a shiver running the length of her spine and she ran her hand over her mouth. A bit distressed? Definitely. This man was truly a lunatic. Then again, they probably all were. She could feel her horror growing more and more as the man spoke, and that wide grin didn't help matters. Mercifully, she kept her face as stoic as possible, and perhaps even more thankfully, she managed to keep the emotion in check mentally as well. When the Dark Seed was put away, she was relieved. He claimed he wanted no empire, and yet he claimed they would stand apart... A dangerous notion, that.
When Phantom spoke up, she felt at least a smidgeon more at ease, and she felt her shoulders loosen again. When they had tightened, she didn't know. Possibly when Ferinus had been speaking. A place of operations, hm? Two options were already on the table, and she kept her mouth shut, as both had been more or less addressed at the moment, save for her Master's. Phantom would surely do so shortly.
Now, where was Ty off to in such a hurry? Curiosity had Nel wanting to follow, but she stayed put. She didn't have an excuse to leave, and she was sure that her Master wouldn't want her leaving anyways. She mentally sighed. She was feeling out of place amongst these Sith, but it was more because she had nothing to say that was of value rather then any other possible reason. The Zabrak looked around at the others at the table, trying to discern their reactions. Observation was one of her key traits that she tried to improve constantly... even if her Master seemed to think otherwise.
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
Posts: 77
Traffic Light: Green
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Post by Nel Bukk on Jun 2, 2015 13:59:42 GMT -8
By and far, Ferinus' greeting seemed the most amicable, and she smiled slightly before she mentally lifted an eyebrow. Unconventional tastes? What did he mean be that? Her eyes shifted about from him to the next who addressed her: Phantom. She smiled as sweetly as she could manage, a bit of teeth even poking through. "I will certainly do my best."
Relax. She needed to relax without being caught off guard. As for the challenge of mentality and wits hinted at by the man who was obviously in charge, her proverbial ears pricked up in excitement. She hadn't made it so long on Kashyyk by her talent with the Force alone, that was for certain. There had been some luck, yes, but quick wit had helped as well. And then she heard the voice of the woman in the not-quite-a-dress ensemble and she wasn't quite certain if she understood who was being spoken to or referred to.
Before she could really formulate anything proper to say, her Master spoke and she looked to him, listening, all while trying to keep in mind what was going on in the room around her. Despondency... She knew that. Knew of her world shattering into so many pieces that not many could be found again. Sorrow lingered in her mind, but she shoved it back some. Now wasn't the time to dwell on that. No. She wouldn't think of the fire and death... Granted, she couldn't hold her tongue as he mentioned the predators of Kashyyk. "And quite a lesson it was, Master."
As she sat at Stormro's right, she let her hand rest gently on the top of her saber. Well, not hers, specifically, but it was in her possession nonetheless. She glanced at him with the mention of competition, an eyebrow raising slightly. The idea of competition didn't appeal to her. The reason why eluded her, but she suspected it had something to do with the Jedi Order... how everyone outshone her no matter how hard she tried. Even if that wasn't the true reason for the subtle surge of an emotion she couldn't place. Again, she pushed her emotions back. Now was not time for practicing her control over them. She needed a clear head... or as clear of a mind as her Master would allow, given his comments.
Exhaustion dogged her, and sitting down seemed to bring it out all the more. The woman knew no one here but Belbe (if only marginally) and her Master. The young Zabrak had to keep that in mind. The pad of her thumb ran over the saber at her side again, and she felt herself soothed by the action. Her shoulders relaxed, releasing some of her tension as she tried to hide her emotions without burying them. Try being the key word, at least.
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Nel Bukk
Kumauri Industries
Posts: 77
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Post by Nel Bukk on May 27, 2015 14:40:15 GMT -8
Nel glanced to her Master with the quirk of an eyebrow at the reminder and warning. She liked to believe she was better then he was implying, but at the same time, her lack of control over her tongue (and her back meeting a tree not too long ago) reminded her otherwise. Emotions churned in her: nervousness, sorrow, irritation, shame. They churned, but it was nothing more then a basic blip. She wasn't calm, but there were no emotions overtaking her at the moment. She was analyzing them, wondering how to deal with them. Her training as a Jedi had trained her unhealthy means of dealing with them, making her more volatile because of it. "I do not make promises, but I will certainly try to keep my calm, Master."
As the door opened, the young woman's eyes flitted from one person to the next, studying them. Each was intriguing in their own way, that was a certainty. Her eyes landed on one of the other women in the room: Tyrana. A sense of inadequacy filled her at seeing how beautiful she was. She looked well taken care of and her clothes were amazing, although too revealing for Nel's own tastes. All she herself wore was the body suit her master had given her underneath her brown, slightly ragged halter top and short brown war skirt. Her analysis was cut short, however, at the mention of her being there. She swallowed and forced a smile, bowing some to those in the room. "It is nice to meet all of you. If Master holds you in such high regard, then there will be plenty for me to learn from all of you."
She hoped she hadn't overstepped her bounds with her words. It hadn't felt right to just bow and say it was nice to meet them. At the same time, she worried that her tongue had moved faster then her mind had been able to process.
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